Yet another in a series of alarming emails he’s been sending from South America:
“Working on a sick Rapist’s Tan today. It’s like a Farmer’s Tan, except instead of wearing a t-shirt you grow a beard in the hot summer sun, let it bake in, and then shave it off, revealing tender pale white rapist skin underneath. The contrast is A-MAZE! Try it sometime!”
I’m sure that would be a hit with the ladies here.