Or do. I dunno anymore…
“Just punched a bee out of the air. Why? Because I could. Most people can’t even swat a bee against a wall, let alone punch the honey out of one that’s MID FUCKING FLIGHT. And if you can ever do something that other people can’t, like play the piano or dunk- just do it. Just do it all the time like those rich white guys said to those poor, talented black kids in the 80’s. “Just do it fellas! Here is some equipment to do it with!” That’s a real quote from the founder of Nike’s autobiography called, “I Took All The Biscuits.” Anyway my point is, it’s important to make people feel small by demonstrating your talents in front of them and their nephews as often as possible.”
“Hahahaha I fell down!”
Important information for summer internships:
“The best way to nail coworkers is to go out to a bar with them and hit on other random chicks at the bar in front of them. You probably won’t get laid that night, but you’ll have just established a wild, disorganized game of Russian Penis Roulette with them all. Heck you might even find yourself banging Linda from Building Maintenance three years later in an abandoned stretch limo if you’re not careful!”
Linda needs to maintain her fucking house better.